By Jane Wheeler
A Person Who Sees!
Slightly humbling is the phrase that comes to mind when thinking about sharing this with you but we have talked about being authentic in our writing so here goes…..
God’s sense of humor is one of those life marvels, from clown fish to giraffes. If I am going to write – God is going to test me and see how “real” I am and thus I feel that I have to be real with you.
At the beginning of February, I went to the Vancouver mainland to help my Mother who has stage 4 Alzheimer’s get ready to attend my nieces wedding. We got her hair permed, shopped for an outfit –but not with her – because we have tried that before and it was too painful for us and the store clerks- tried the outfit on (which is actually one of the hardest things) and checked on her shoe possibilities. Stage 4 means that my mother has about a 30 minute memory window. I repeated myself a lot. For example, when we were trying on the outfit I had bought, we would get the skirt and the top on about which time she would say, “where am I going again?” and we would start on the wedding story. Then we would try the dressy jacket and shoes and she would ask, “what do I need these shoes for?” and we would begin again.
The people who care for our elderly and aged are amazing folks, my heart is truly blessed at the way they take care of people like my mom – with respect and dignity. We do not thank them enough and maybe we do not even really “see” them because after all, in our minds, we think things like: “they are just doing their job”. I was exhausted daily after being with mom for hours at a time, the emotional toll and drain of being with someone with Alzheimer’s is huge. Those are pretty amazing people who do this caretaking day in and out.
Back to me – I was feeling pretty good – got all the necessary things done, and I thought I was doing well emotionally. On day four of my trip I was getting ready for the day and had curled my hair. I was putting in the “curl paste” – something that makes your curls stay in longer when I paused to take a look at the container. For the past three days I had been putting hand cream into my hair – not hair paste.
I was rather taken back. All it required was reading the label but I had grabbed a jar similar in shape and assumed it was the hair paste. I felt rather silly at this point.
But the lesson for me came when I thought it through – in life we do things instinctively – without really taking the time to “look” and “see”. I had grabbed what I thought was the right thing but in doing it aimlessly – I got it wrong. I had wandered around Vancouver for 3 days with hand cream in my hair.
I giggle over this now but it has caused me to think carefully about how many times we instinctively do something and not really take the time to “see” what is in front of us – people, things, God’s daily provisions.
I want to be a person who “sees” and I pray God is molding me into this type of person.
What if God only saw “selective” things, He picked and chose moments to look in on us and missed the rest?
Or He was so busy He absently reacted out of habit to our prayer requests (as in assuming I had the right hair paste and getting it wrong) instead of responding in love to each person so graciously as He does?
What if I truly believed that God was not interested in every detail of my life from the smallest, tiniest detail to the large and overwhelming waves that come at me?
I am so Thankful that I have a personal God who “sees”