Tag Archives: abilities

dear Vanessa ~…on being content

dear Vanessa ~…on being content

Dear Vanessa,

I have a job that I do every day, I get fulfilled in some ways – I love the people.  But in other ways, I feel like something is missing.  I am not feeling completely challenged.   I often start asking myself, is this is way that life is supposed to be?  Was I meant for this?  Or something more?



Dearest Ann,

I am sure you are not alone.  Many of us struggle at various points in our lives, asking ourselves the questions that you have gone through already.  And then let our minds travel to the places where we start asking ourselves “what if?”.

What if I ……

Life happens, relationships happen, and they shift us in a different direction.  And to tell you the truth, after 20 years I still do not have the answer of who I want to be when I grow up.  For a good portion of my life, I had thought that if I attained a title, wealth or status I could feel better about myself.   Looking to others or jobs to satisfy the internal need of feeling worthy. Or wondering if there was something more.  Little did I know, everything I needed was right there in front of me. Being content exactly where I was.

Did you know that you can be fulfilled right now?  Satisfied exactly where you are and with who you are?  And it doesn’t have to be in one place?

There are a few things that need to align:

1)      Use your abilities:  if you look back on your life you should see a theme of your interest areas.  These interest areas created that sparkle in you where you felt amazing after you completed the task.  These are your God given talents, maximize them, use them – even if it isn’t for financial gain.    Once you start using them you will feel that fire internally ignite.  For me, this is helping others in need, and the ability to relate to others freely through communication.  This could happen at work, at home, anywhere ;)

2)      Enjoyment in what you are doing:  In order to align your abilities with what you are doing, you need to feel the inner enjoyment from what you are doing.  The feeling inside when you do this special something with your abilities, feels long lasting and good.   You feel like you have contributed, while feeling fulfilled inside out.

3)      You are willing to take a risk:  Sometimes utilizing our abilities may take risk, or time and effort where we may feel like we don’t have the time.  But I can tell you this much, there is no reward without the risk.  Fulfillment in what we do may require us to go outside of our comfort zone.

4)      An opportunity presents itself: this may not be as evident as we would like it, but if we are aware of our talents we will be more aware of potential opportunities that surround us.

5)         Pray:  Pray for guidance and direction from God.    He will make straight your paths.  It may not be on your time, but he will reveal where you need to be.

You may be asking yourself what if I don’t know my gifts or talents?   There are simple ways of discovering this.  Ask a friend or family  member – what do they see in you?  There are assessments online that can assist in the excavation process (spiritual and non-spiritual), pull out at magazine or a few and cut out words or pictures that appeal to you scrap book it all – maybe you will see a theme.

Life may be confusing at times, and sometimes, we just need to be content exactly where we are.

1 Timothy 6:6-11 (NIV) But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.  But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness.

Dear Lord God, many times we falter on our direction in our lives.   I ask that you help make straight our paths when we are confused and lost sheep.  I pray for discernment, wisdom, peace and understanding with all of our circumstances. I pray for this in Jesus’ Name Amen

May you be blessed beautiful lady,


The New Girl


Dear Vanessa,aug 29 pic

My teenage daughter is having difficulty as we are transitioning to a new community.   My husband was recently promoted, but with the promotion came a move…  My daughter looks sad, and we are one month into the move now.  She has confided in me that she doesn’t feel accepted in her new school.    I want to support her in every way I can, but I feel the same way as her – I miss my old friends and it has been difficult.


Concerned Mother.

Dearest Concerned Mother,

As a mother sometimes you just wish you could control the circumstances surrounding your children.   Just to wrap them in a bubble of protection, or keep them innocent….  Sometimes I wonder, what can’t children see how much they are loved and accepted through their parent’s eyes?

And for them to know that they are loved unconditionally. 

God wants this for us.  He wants us to know we are loved and beautifully made.    

As a young girl I too struggled with these same issues, my father moved around a lot.  With every move came its challenges in relationships.   But if I could go back in time, I would tell my younger self a few things:

“You are beautifully made; there is only one of you in this world.”

“You are unconditionally loved, always – it does not matter what you do, you will always be loved the same by parents (including God)”

“Don’t look to others to feel good about yourself.  Believe in yourself, look at your abilities and talents  - believe in YOU!!”

“Go to God, rely on Him for help.  He will lead you where you need to be.”

“You cannot control what happens in this life, the one thing you can control is how you respond.  Chose a response that is positive in all situations J ”

I don’t know the “why” things have happened the way they have in my life but I do know He works everything for good.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28 NIV)

Moving is tough, changes in people, places and things…   But at the same time, it opens a new door to possibility.    You both will get through this together and will come out shining!

You know your daughter well, and can identify with her experiences.   What a glorious opportunity to navigate through the issues together!  Just take some baby steps together.  One suggestion I would have for you is working through this AMAZING book together, it helps with self-discovery and growing love for your own self within.


Dear Lord God,

When one door closes, we know another one opens.   I pray for You to guide this mother and all parents that are trying to guide their children through changes in this life.   I pray for You to infiltrate the minds your children so that they are full of hope, abundance, and clarity.   I pray for You to give them confidence and reassurance during the challenges in this life.  I pray for this in Jesus’ Name Amen.

May you be bless beautiful lady,


If you have a question for Vanessa please email her at [email protected]

You can also read Vanessa’s personal blog and journey at www.nesschesters.wordpress.com